The Enemy of My Enemy

When I was a kid, I would go to my school for summer daycare/summer school/summer babysitting. It was me and a bunch of other kids and classmates all hanging out through the summer with a bit of 'adult supervision.' Very little of my time was educational during these months. Most of my time was hanging out, sweating in the sun, playing basketball, Legos, or just being kids for the most part. I did this for a few years from kindergarten through third grade while on the retirement sandbar of Florida. 

Over these summers, my friends would play G.I. Joe’s There were good guys, bad guys, and the desolation in between. Generally, I was not wanted when my friends would play G.I. Joe’s. I would ask to play, they would decline. I would watch for hours, never invited. I tried many different tactics over these summers. Pretty much all of my tactics ended the same, me wandering away spinning myself on the merry-go-round or watching cars driving by the fence. *cue world's smallest violin* However, one day I had an especially creative way to get to play.

I was watching my friends play with their action figures and they were combating the evil COBRA and their dastardly plan to take over the world. As I was watching, I noticed the COBRA could not fight back. They sat there, inanimate, and docile, sitting ducks if you will . What fun could it be to defeat an enemy without a brain? I found my way in. I would be their enemies. I would be the brain behind their opposition. I would be able to play G.I. Joe’s with too!

I too had a place to play. I too had the ability to join in. My scheming did not end there. After much asking and convincing, they let me play as the COBRA opposition. They decided I was a worthy opponent, if not only to be destroyed relentlessly. After a few thorough beatings, I was finally able to make the transition. The figurine I had identified as the second in command of the COBRA Command wanted to defect to the other team. They were resistant. They did not want another player in the game. 

They wanted an enemy. 

They did not want me to be playing with them.  

They wanted to beat their enemy. I was their enemy. After a time, I was still able to defect. I joined the G.I. Joe Real American Hero team. As the summer drew on, I was able to continue to be the bad-guys each day, I would defect, taking less and less time as the summer drew on. They even allowed me to join the G.I. Joe’s from the beginning. 

I was persistent. I was unwanted. I found a way to step over the boundary and become more than I was given credit for. 

What obstacles in your life are you giving up on? What obstacles in your life are you not taking the time to overcome? What opportunities are you missing out on?

COBRA Defector,

–JT

What We Talk About, When We Talk About Our Opposites

I have noticed people’s conversations with me can be somewhat polarized. Not generally referencing me, more in regards to talking about the things I like and endorse. For instance, I am an Apple user. I appreciate the Apple ecosystem. I like the iPhone, iPad, Apple TV, iMac, Macbook Air, Macbook Pro, Retina Macbook Pro, and I’m sure one day, I’ll even have an WATCH. 

Not everyone likes Apple, their hardware, their software, their philosophies, or their mode of operation. 

It is good for everyone to not love Apple. 

They are not the product for everyone. 

Oddly enough, I might be able to argue, this country was founded by some people who didn’t exactly want to have one mode of operation for all people. I wouldn’t carry that analogy out too far, but it does begin the discussion of my greater point, we all march to the beat of our own drum. 

This is so good. It is good for me to march to the beat of my own drum and you to march to the beat of your drum.

I bring up the Apple versus Microsoft, or the Apple versus Android, or the Apple versus Rolex conversation because it is a great analogy for the greater conversation. The conversation revolving around the people I don’t disagree with. When someone brings up their opinions on Apple, I quietly nod my head, make noncommittal remarks, and generally try to steer the conversation away from technology. I don’t like talking with people who want to talk in terms of extremes.

I especially I don’t like having to listen to people who are going to build straw man after straw man and angrily set them on fire. 

These are the conversations and exercises in listening where I am most pained. I want to create conversations where we can disagree with one another and there is not baseless name calling or wide sweeping assumptions based on limited knowledge or zero experience. 

Perhaps, you cannot relate to the example I am using. Apple is too tertiary for you. You do not resonate with technology. How about the Ford versus Chevrolet debate or the Republican versus Democrat debate. Maybe the conversation is better suited for you to discuss religion in these extremes, perhaps atheist versus christian is the conversation you know better. 

In any of these conversations, I do not ask anyone to ever change what they think about the other side of the coin. I am more interested in how you talk about the other side of the coin. Do you talk about the other side of the coin as if they are intelligent people, products, or options? Or do you talk about them as if they are less valuable than day old popcorn on the floor of your town’s 

How do you talk about the people who march to the beat of a different drum than you do?