Fast Food

I have stopped eating at most fast food restaurants. Occasionally, once or twice a year I will in a moment of pure gluttony or desperation pick up some fast food, but otherwise? No.

(I recognize it is a bit of a privilege to be able to make this decision, and for that I am thankful.)

It is also a decision based on my values. Most simply it has to do with eating healthy. Equally importantly, it is out of frustration with the service. These poor people are working for a mega-corp for sub par wages in a job with little to no positive long term outlook.

And with their employer having no interest in their long term success. They have no interest in the joy of their customer. They are looking to make it through their shift, go home, and hopefully have made enough money to make it till the next time they get paid.

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I have been there and I totally get why they are that way. And likewise, I do not want to support the mega corp they work for. I want to support places that are genuinely interested in their most important customer...

Their employees.

For instance, when I worked at Starbucks (granted it has been a while) they seemed genuinely interested in my success and profitability beyond my time at Starbucks. Between stock options, retirement, healthcare, free pound of coffee every week, a generous discount on everything else, and a well outlined career path and transferring within the company to a place I might like to work longterm. They had enough opportunities for me to feel valued and likewise value my customer.

Because the company was so interested in taking care of me, I was very invested in taking care of my most important customer, the actual customer on the other side of the counter ordering drinks, pastries, and hot food. I was thrilled to take care of them because my company was thrilled to take care of me and it was a pleasure to work at Starbucks for years.

Who are you supporting? How are you giving your subordinates, friends, family, or direct customer relations more than an a transactional relationship? How are you adding value to other people’s lives? How are you engaging others for their benefit first?

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Success

Success seems to be an elusive unicorn. There have been so many different measurements and tests and surveys and models. Yet authors have not been able to write the definitive book that will lead to the success anyone is looking for.

On many levels it is easier to assume fairies show up and sprinkle success dust over the successful and do not sprinkle success dust over the unsuccessful.

I know I would rather assume the successful writers, speakers, authors, and software companies I want to align myself with are sprinkled with success dust and that is why I have not been able to attain a certain level of success or accolade in my life.

The more difficult assumption is to assume the successful showed up and put in the hard work and now they are successful because they started putting in the hard work and did not stop.

They

Did

Not

Stop

I am sure they wanted to stop. I am sure they had reasons to stop. There were hard moments when they were losing it all. Things were on the verge of not working and everything was about to catch fire if they stopped working.

Still, they kept going. They did not stop. And today they have the mark of success I look at and admire. It was not given to them. It was not an award the received for being the 1 millionth startup that year.

They showed up. They kept working. Especially when it was hard, they kept showing up.

What are you working on? What excuse are you giving yourself about not showing up? How can you start working on your project? When can you show up again? Have you put the appointment on your calendar to keep yourself from scheduling over it?

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Stay on Target

You have seen your organization state their goals. You you have seen your organization act on their actual goals. Hopefully the two are aligned.

Spending your time on your organization’s goals will always net a positive. Your role has stated goals. Spending your time on your role’s stated goals will always net a positive.

In your personal life, spending your time on your simple goals will net a positive. So that when you achieve the measured result, you can celebrate. As you execute the actions needed to attain your goal, you can check off the associated boxes. Once more, we can celebrate our completion especially when we hit our goal in the allotted time. And nothing feels better than hitting a goal that is relevant to you, your family, and your personal life.

What goals do you have for your life? Are they simple, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time specific? (Yes, I tweaked SMART goals to fit some of my priorities.) When was the last time you set, tweaked, or took action on your goals?

How about failure? Do you know what it would like to fail at your goals? Do you know what it would feel like to fail a your goals? When will you assess these decisions so you do not accidentally set yourself on the path to failure?

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The Real Tizz Shady

“Fake it till you make it.” – Somebody said this. 

WHY?

It is a terrible philosophy. You have two outcomes. 

1. You make it in an area where you should not have made it. 

2. You don’t.

I would guess the latter is the more likely outcome. Truly, how often do you make it? How often does anyone make it? Why was I faking it in the first place?

Why was I faking it in the first place!?

Seriously, I was trying to fake my ability to do things I did not love doing, and I am not good at, in the first place. I do not think I will love doing everything I do in life. There will always be things in life and work that are simply the things I do not want to do. However, I was trying to do things that I find interesting. But I was doing it simply to please others and because I thought it would just, ‘be okay.’ 

I cannot come up with a scenario where, “fake it till you make it” actually makes sense. I am even more upset with myself for trying to do it. Not intentionally, but it is what happened. I tried to be someone I am not, something I am not. I am glad to be moving past that. I am upsetting the status quo. I am making changes to the way I act and interact with others so I am not trying to be anyone other than me. 

I am who I am. I want to be who I am. I want to be a healthy version of who I am for the people I love so they are better at being who they are. None of us need to fake anything. 

Where are you faking it?

–The Real Tizz Shady

Epic Failure

If revenge is a dish best served cold; then, failure is a dish best not served at all. At least that is how I’ve operated in my life up till now. Any time I apply myself to something I succeed. Maybe I’m not the best at it in the world, but I would at least succeed. I would decide “task xyz” is worth my time and effort, pour my heart and soul into it, and I would be a success. 

The part of this equation I’ve never dealt with is when I pour myself into a task or working to achieve a goal and then I fail. Not in the sense of I came in second place in a competition. More in the sense of, the goal was totally and utterly unachieved. 

This summer I encountered one of these “unachieved goals.” This is part of the reason I’m falling apart. I’ve never encountered failure of this proportion before and I have no healthy way of encouraging myself to get back on the horse. When a failure of this proportion is built on a foundation of self doubt and issues with my dad and all of a sudden, I have the perfect recipe for an angry depression. 

Now I have to figure out a healthy way to stop these things from destroying me. I have to figure out how to get myself back on the horse. Some sort of motivation maybe? I am truly clueless. I am looking into myself and every time I turn the page to the, “How To Motivate Yourself” chapter it is as if the whole thing is written in hieroglyphics. 

I don’t know how to motivate myself past failure besides to tell myself to just keep going. This method only works for so long with me. There will be more to this. I am not giving up on this, I just don’t know what more to do.

What do you do when you encounter failure?